This is one of the EXTREMELY RARE nights my daughter falls asleep early; I haven’t begged her or had to rock her to sleep. I guess skipping the nap was a GOOD THING today buahahahahahahaaa! I am finally sipping on chamomile tea, I am finally sitting here typing this up!

If you’re waiting for something cool and exciting…well, this is about as exciting as it gets. The fact that i, MOM OF ONE, (Alhamdulilah), get me time, is just INCREDIBLE.  I feel like a million bucks with my chamomile tea and my baby monitor. Granted, I have done nothing special, I give all the credit to my parents. Whether I like it or not, the majority of what they say has worked for us. Alhamdulilah. I say ‘not’ in the previous question NOT because  I didn’t particularly hate their advice, but because i feel i resisted it to some degree- i wanted to do things my way, and frankly, i thought other moms my age would have more current advice. HOWEVER,  there is no substitute for experience. My parents have been super supportive in everything i do with my child but some of their advice has blown my mind- in a good way. I find moms my age can sometimes be EXTREMELY pushy, thinking that because we are of THIS day and age, we KNOW more. However, it is that PUSHINESS that is sooo irritating. I AM NOT SAYING ALL MOMS ARE LIKE THIS … just quite a few i’ve met…!

I ended up having to leave half way because my baby cried. I guess Me time will be brief. I need my rest anyway.

In the last year, the stages my child has gone thru blow me away. From the way she now communicates to the way she began to walk… it blows my mind. Everyday, she learns and teaches me something new. It is a journey. Sometimes i feel guilty that i am not totally present. I pay attention else where sometimes, but i think that’s only human. I try so hard to be super mom but i realize i fail every day. And that failure is alright as well. Because IT’S ALLLLL IN MY HEAD !

I miss home these days.

I miss people too.

I should sleep actually…Here i was thinking i’d have so much to talk about, but i’ve just given myself something massive to think about- am i capable of being a better mother ? What am i lacking ? (one OBVIOUS answer is ORGANIZATION) how do i correct this? Do other moms go thru this feeling of self doubt and worry?

Am i over thinking this?

Am i stressed because i am an over thinker…?

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