Acquisition

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Technically, this post should be called ‘I-CANT-BELIEVE-THEY-BOUGHT-ME-THAT’ but i thought i would tone it down. A wedding, particularly a desi wedding, involves A LOT of shopping.

I think for once in my life, I feel incredibly overwhelmed.I also feel incredibly grateful but i haven’t been able to say thank you to my parents…its not that i don’t want to, its just that i feel so … shocked and it just doesn’t come out. Its an emotion that wants to thank them and thank God, but right now, i just don’t have words.  Lack of words. And here I am writing it down. I guess a card is in order.

I did write them a thank you not in my wedding invite- the printer made a mistake and forgot to write ‘A Message From the Bride’  on the top. I am horribly ticked off but can do nothing about it.

I was thinking how incredible its is to be getting married to people who don’t expect a girl to bring any materials to their home. Or if they do, they have not said anything. Having been through the rishta process for a while, I had seen and heard of people who asked for a dowry. And there are ways of doing it. And if you think a lot of us have it ‘bad’, think of people in villages who think this unislamic practice is NECESSARY and they spend their  energies saving for their daughters…sorry, the IN-LAWS of their daughter/s.

Marriage has me thinking of a lot. My rights as a woman, for example. Do I really have any? Will my husband uphold them? Will I be strong enough for myself? I think, I plan and then I think some more and tell myself that things will be alright IN SHA ALLAH. Truthfully, you can plan all you want, but ultimately, nothing is in your hands. You have a lot of work to do, but it has to be done in the moment.

In the weeks coming up to the wedding, I’ve noticed people say, ‘Haww, bataya bi nahi k shaadi ho rahi hai…mujay bula rahi ho na?’ [‘Haawww, you didn’t even tell me you were getting married…are you inviting me or not?’ ]  OR THEN, people have offered to help without having ever had a conversation with me before! ALSO I’ve seen people who assume they are invite, tell you they are really happy for you…and then they never call. You never hear from them…You hear they tell people they are psyched to go to your wedding but then they never call. THAT SUCKS.

Inviting yourself to a wedding IS AWKWARD people. Let me just say that we plan for a wedding and it would be a JOY to have everyone, but realistically, it is sorta impossible because you have so many things to think about…not being invited to a wedding does NOT mean I hate you or didn’t want you there, it means I just had no space. And lets be REAL, you will not always be invited to every wedding, no matter what, it will not happen!Don’t let that cause problems in your friendship. It’s not worth it.

I’m hungry for attention since like, last week. It’s not like I am NOT getting attention, I’m getting plenty of it, but i really want W to call. He has been MIA for the last 4 days because he has been working- wedding planning and actually working his little bottom off. It’s so difficult to have a conversation these days and, coincidentally, that’s all I want. I want to know what is going on on that side of the wedding preps. When will this end!?!?!

Also, getting married made me think of one more thing…i might need to know how to paint my face. Besides the general, MAC, YSL, CHANEL, etc, etc, I saw these two Pakistani brands and I almost got them, but not quite…Luscious and Musarrat Misbah …It just occurred to me that Nabila has a brand too..Maybe I should actually try and see if they work because they are all targeted for Asian Skin… what do you think??? Also,Musarrat Misbah says her make up is HALAL, How COOL is that! Any ideas what people recommend to the new bride???

 

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