Warm

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I’ve wrapped this fabulously warm wrap around my shoulders. I let my warm tears flow and I actually feel happy. Not all tears are bad you know. Not all emotion is negative. In moments of tenderness, it is normal to shed some tears. And it is normal to feel a fuzzy feeling in your chest. One that illuminates you and lifts you from where you were.

Things seem to be going well. Alhamdulilah. And even if they aren’t, It merits an Alhamdulilah. Our moments of weakness are over; here we are…facing it like warriors. Here we are, creating new moments, new images, new feelings. And we will create, In sha Allah, something beautiful and something to make us smile. We created memories before; the only thing is, sometimes, we have to let things go. That can be hard, so, so hard. But it’s the right thing to do- the way to move forward.

I think where we sometimes fail is when we really want something badly and that sense of not getting it, it hurts. It stings. It stings when it’s a person who has broken our trust and disappointed us. And it hurts…but that too is cured with time.

I’ve taken too long in letting the disappointment ebb away. I saw this chick flick and was genuinely reminded of how there are people that exist that can uplift you. Yes, there are disappointments, but even certain disappointments exist to uplift you. You. You matter. You always did. You mattered enough for a friend to give you their shoulder. You mattered enough for someone to reach out to you. You mattered enough to seek yourself out.

Why do some people feel the need to put themselves down ? I wonder if they realize that their constant self-pitying and whining has made people detach from their side?

I want to feel warmer than right now! I think i might need a shoulder to lean on as well…and i think that is absolutely alright!

 

Buried treasure

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I lay in bed longer than necessary. That feeling of incredible strength and vulnerability- two very different but powerful emotions- coursing through me like an electric current. I seldom allowed myself to look back, and sometimes it happens subconsciously but it’s funny! I unearthed buried treasure the other day…a letter I had written to myself – well actually it was only a paragraph long and it was in my wallet. Funnily, it mentions people I have to pray for. Why isn’t my own name up there …? When exactly did I forget to pray for myself?

There’s strength in loving yourself that I believe we sometimes forget. We’re so focused on everything and anything other than US. Ourselves. And then there are others that just can’t seem to see past the edge of their own noses. They lose the idea of others while looking for themselves in everyone. Jeez. It’s hard eh?

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